Danny was different from all the other kids in Kathy Whalin's class. We didn't know that he was in that class at the time, because he wasn't generally mainstreamed with his classmates. Most of his time at school was spent time in room 6 and 7, the two connected special ed. classrooms in the school. He only occasionally spent time with his real class. Actually, I should say that he did spend most of his time with his real class, which was in room 7. The sweetest kids in the school spent most of their time there, while the rest of the school had no idea who they actually were at heart and made fun of them for how they moved or talked -- perhaps out of fear, fear of being an outcast.
    In the beginning of fifth grade, I read a really amazing book called Stuck in Neutral about a boy with Cerebral Palsy. In the book, the boy could not talk, or voluntarily move any muscle in his body. He had no way to communicate to the world. I showed this book to my teacher and told her how amazing it was and how it made me look at everything from a different perspective. I told my teacher, Mrs. Sinclair, about this book, and looking back at that year, I think that one of the reasons she chose me to be Danny's buddy was because of my interest in this book. She knew I was taken up in mental disabilities, and she knew I was responsible and caring. Even though I can't say for surte that that was the reason she chose me, I think it was part of it.
    I remember my teacher calling me up during SSR and me thinking, "Oh God, what did I do?" But what she talked to me about was not getting in trouble; it was about my first grade reading buddy. She asked me if I was interested in being buddies with a boy who wasn't learning at the rate the other kids in Kathy's class were; in other words, someone who was retarded. She said that he wasn't that easy to control, both mentally and physically, and that I should pick someone who could help me, someone who I would get along with, someone who would be open-minded to the prospect of a relationship with a special ed. kid. I couldn't choose between my two friends Connie and Isabel, so I chose them both.
    My teacher was right; Danny wasn't what you'd call easy to handle. Sometimes he would try to hurt you or run away, or do something that he couldn't do, either because it was against the rules or because he wasn't capable. Sometimes he'd get frustrated and annoyed, and you wouldn't be able to understand what was going on. Sometimes he'd try to harm you when he got like that. He'd grimace and screw up his face, and grip your arm hard. It didn't hurt, but he was trying to be unpleasant to you, and that was against the rules.
    But all of our hard work really paid off. He could be so sweet, so happy. And he really loved us. I know that when I was gone for a day, sick or on vacation, when I came back I was informed that he was asking about me. He did that for Isabel and Connie, as well.
    Danny talked in the third person. He'd always say, "Danny's dad," or "Danny's going home?" On Fridays every week he would go home early because he went to a swimming program for autistic kids. That day his father wouldn't pick him up and all day he would say, "Danny's dad's coming!" and we would tell him, "No, today is Friday. You're going swimming. Dad comes later." But he would repeat it all through the day because his dad coming was such a big part of his routine. I also remember one time where he had a toy school bus and he would sing under his breath as he apprehensively paced the inside perimeter of room 7. Isabel asked him what he was singing, and he kind of smiled and went on muttereing. Then he'd shake his head, still smiling, and we would eventually go back to talking.
    We saw Danny every day, but he wasn't the only child in room 7 we spent time with. Connie and Isabel and I would come there during lunch and SSR to see Danny and the other kids. Paavlina and Paul and Matthew and Bowmun and Will and Asher were all really important to us. Paul and Matthew were really good friends, and Paul's hair was really soft. He was really small and talked with a slight lisp. He really liked to touch people's heads. Matthew was tan with curly black hair, and he was taller than Paul but a lot quieter. When he smiled, his whole face lit up. Paavlina was loud and gave kisses, and she was small like Paul. Will was in a wheelchair but he was really smart and he and his aide developed a way of communicating because he couldn't talk. Bowmun was small and quiet and didn't come much to room 7. And Asher was loud but didn't really form words, but he was an amazing artist. He loved to draw, paint, sculpt, any medium and he'd create something.
    Sometimes I don't know how Danny's family dealt with it all. His older brother had (and still has) cancer, and with the attention and Care Danny needed it seemed like the easiest thing could've been to put Danny in some kind of center. But they chose the harder way, which was also the way that Danny was happiest, I think. Danny's dad was the sweetest guy ever, and he completely supported Danny and was really present in his life. Every day when he came to pick Danny up, Danny's face would light up and he'd yell, "Dad!" at the top of his lungs. His dad would hug him really hard and he'd also smile like this was the best part of his day. If Danny was challenging at school, I can't really imagine what it would've been like to have him at home.
    You can tell that this is a bittersweet thing for me. I hate the people who tease the retarded kids. Sometimes, during SSR, some of our class would sit outside and read. During that time, we'd go to room 7, which was right down the hall from our normal classroom. Kids would sit there and bang their hands against their chests in a "spazzy" way, or make faces or something. Retarded literally means "slow," and no one laughs at you if you can't grasp imaginary numbers when you're five. But they laugh at you if you act a certain way, or say things differently, or look different. Remembering that year of fifth grade brings back a lot of hard feelings for the people who made fun of the children in room 7. Some of the people were my friends, but not for long. They got the message from me that it was NOT OKAY to tease the room 7 kids, or any other kids with mental disabilities.
    When Connie and Isabel and I graduated from Ocean View, Danny's dad gave us all cards, flowers, and chocolate. He didn't have to, but he appreciated our work since our presence in Danny's life made a difference to Danny. He said that he would miss us and our care for Danny, and that he wished we didn't have to leave the elementary school without Danny because we were such a great team working with him. We didn't want to move on, either, if it meant losing Danny in our everyday lives, but we survived. Last year, sixth grade, I saw him every Friday at a swimming program for autistic kids I volunteered in (the same one I mentioned before). I also participated in an adapted P.E. program. I wouldn't have done those things without Danny's presence in my life two years ago. I still come back to the memories of him and realize how much I miss him. At timea I wish I could be at Ocean View again so that I could see him every day like in fifth grade. Writing this paper reminds me of how big of a connection we had and how it changed my outlook on life. I never would have done the programs I did without him, never would have made some of the friends I have at the middle school, never would have discovered the cruel side of some of my peers without him. And most importantly, I gave him something, too. I gave him my love and care and friendship. He taught me so much. Danny changed my life.